Can anyone share how it is for them living far from the adult kids...do things seem to work out ? do they visit you? do you visit them?...just wondering?
In My case its especially hard with two new grandchildren in the past year(my 1st and 2nd) I have been back to the U.S. this past February and plan on going back again in Sept. but the cost of travel is and has been quite expensive. None of My adult kids have any desire to visit. Quezon City ain't exactly Cancun.....LOL. I am not sure its going to be easy to adjust to.....:( IMHO
Yes, Adult kids do visit My two grown Kids are in the Philippines now visiting. My son, Taryn, 37 is from South Lake Tahoe, California, USA, where as my daughter, Kristen, 35 is from Hunter's Valley outside of Sydney Australia. I raised them to be independent, but was always there to support them and guide them. They are independent. They have traveled the world previously, and are enjoying there stay here, yesterday we visited the Whale Sharks. Today we will go to the Wednesday market and maybe the twin lakes in the afternoon. They enjoy the outdoors and there are many things to do here including the waterfall hike. I meet them in Manila and suggested we stay there one day, but by 2 the afternoon of the first day then said they understood why I felt they only would like to be in Manila for one day...lol. My relationship with them has not really changed since moving as it was always a somewhat long distance relationship. If you get your phone connections working, Majicjack or other you can stay in touch. There are video-phone applications also. Since we are spread through out the planet, me being in the Philippines is not a big issue. There are no grand-children, which may change the issues, and feeling. They enjoy each others company, so coming here was a good place for the family to meet and see how dad is living now. Since they have between them been to over 50 countries previously, traveling for them was not an issue. They live by the "Lonely Planet" series of travel books. Keep the communication going and things should go well, but each family is different. Only you can decide how you feel about being apart from your grown children. Personally I am happy here, but am glad they came to visit. I have been here 7 months and a visit much earlier probably would have been too soon for me to know how to guide them around to see the things I know they like.
Good questions. For me, it is hard because I am very close to my son and daughter. My son has been to my home here twice so he knows the life style, my daughter has not been here. You can communicate with them in different ways. If you and them can afford Ipads or Iphones you can view each other on a call. I haven't used Skipe but I understand it is an inexpensive way of calling. I also buy prepaid Globe TIPID cards, 40 min. of call time for 100 pesos to call long distance. I call weekly and email frequently and put pictures on Facebook, that helps. It is helpful if your adult children understand why you are moving here. In my case, it was simple could not afford to retire in California. You got to do what you got to do. Good luck.
My son one and only is not yet adult but this is his final year before turning 18 early next year..he wanted to visit me in philippines when i was there but his summer free time found me in hawaii from his mothers place in newyork city..man its expensive to fly him new york to hawaii round trip...i will be sponsoring his college for 4 years through a program that covers him well with some living cost too so hes free to go out of new york if he finds school(not in philippines i hope)out of state...so when he turns 18 we have plans for him to fly to visit after hischool graduation meet me in hawaii or central america..he wants to go central america and it would be easier on my pocket if it were cheaper country...i grew up son of american expat to africa who mariied african and my father is now expat inamerica for so long he has US passport and his original one too...now i am traveling living all around like my father and mom raised me,and i think i will be getting my son started on that track and hope to survive enough to see if he sticks to it lifelong...i may have to pay his tickets to fly to visit me vacations while he goes college..i would do as incentive for him to bear through college and take it seriously for 4 years at least( he better,i never got free ride through college)...i guess if you really want some one to visit ,you buy them the ticket...His mother can stay in newyork...
If you build it up, they will come. Just say enough nice things about the Philippines to pique their curiosity, focus on the beach resorts and lower prices and they just might pay you a visit one day. Leave out the day to day annoyances that hound our expat friends. After all, your guests won't be staying long enough to experience the realities of living here. Depending on your budget and theirs, offering them a plane ticket might also make the trip more appealing. It would be hard to refuse an offer like that.
My son is 43 years old. He borrowed money from me. (a very large sum), borrowed money from his Grandmother, borrowed money from my brother, then sent us all a text saying he never wanted to hear from us again. His wish has been granted. I was in the States in July and tried to contact him and he refused to answer my text or calls and my brother tried also with no avail. And as far as we know he's not on drugs or has any addictions like that. Oh well, his decision.
Reminds me of an old tune by Little Feat in the 80's: On Your Way Down -- Alan Toussaint Sunrise Sunset Since the beginning it hasn't changed yet People fly high begin to lose sight You can't see very clearly when you're in flight It's high time that you found The same people you misuse on your way up You might meet up On your way down
sounds a bit like my Son, set him and his wife up in a business I got for him so he could finish his apprenticeship, become his Bank/ financer the little turd went belly up in less than 2 years leaving me with the debt, won’t reply a Birthday greeting or any emails, it might have something to do with that I hooked up with a Filipino ??? and she was hotter that his fat b*tch wife lol
