I have several Vietnam and Gulf war vets aquiantances and they seem to be one of the nicest people around. With calm and relaxed disposition, I mean do we all to experience "almost dead" part in our lives just to become a mr nice guy?
I don't think being a vet makes much of a difference. I know some real nice guys that are vets....but I also know some that are monsters (especially after a few drinks). Just my 2 cents.
This is strictly my opinion based on observation, but I think "nice people" can develop their niceness not so much from what they have experienced, but more by how they think/feel from what they have experienced. Empathy plays a big part in being "nice". How you think about where you've been and how you think about what you have experienced plays a part, too. So I suppose for me, it's not so much about where I've been, it's more about how I think about where I've been/experienced. Though pain can be a great teacher, it is far from being a gentle one. But it is the moving through the darkness of pain that one can often be presented with the dawning of a better day for their head and their heart and their hands. The "BE, KNOW and DO" of the human being. There's a great little book out there I got on my 15th birthday and it's messages really helped me when I later experienced what many people would consider "traumatic events". It's called "Man's Search For Meaning", written by Viktor Frankl
That piqued my interest. I found this for anyone else interested in reading it : https://ia800506.us.archive.org/20/items/MansSearchForMeaning_201507/Man's Search For Meaning.pdf
Bearing in Mind, that All Countries have War Vets not just the US. In the UK we are/Where called Officers and Gentlemen, NCO's and Enlisted men were /are considered above the a norm of the Rat Race. Something Long Forgotten
Amazon books has a web site where you can order the book. It comes in paperback, used, and hardcover - various printed editions, too. nwlivewire