Review Disgusting Incident at Why Not Restaurant

I have tried to talk with family but no matter how gentle I try and go about it, it ALWAYS seems to hurt feelings. Sorry; but sometimes trying to deal with things can be so very frustrating when I am so use to being able to sit and talk rationally, even when I did counseling back in Oz I never came across reactions like I have experienced here. Nowadays I try and sit inside quietly and avoid all that is going on around me here...

 

Whoa people, this Thread is about a Foreigner behaving badly so let's forget the face thing, One thing we Westerners can do is be upfront with our own Elk and if we can't then What sort of people are we.

 

That's Ok but it was a foreigner that was behaving Badly so should we not try and ask him to mend his ways

 

Sorry Brian but reading this I wonder how long you will last here.

 

Sadly I am of the same thought lately. At first it was great, but taking on advice from my Wife's other relatives, I think soon we will be moving along for some peace and quiet, living so close to family is not always a good thing as I have discovered...

 

Brian mate, Wherever you go you will get family problem via FB, the Phone or a Visit but somehow I feel You are missing a Point, family problems are one thing Arrogant and out of hand Foreigners are another. If any of us could actually get over the Clanship and Face thing of the Local be it Family or Friends etc; we might stand a chance of getting somewhere. It is my belief honestly, that the problems you and so many others may endure (I get it too) are a reason that we (The foreigner) just give up on a situation and go and get pissed then Stories like this appear. The One thing to remember is You are not on your own when it comes to the Local and the Face, Pride thing but it is how we manage the aftermath that matters, That can be where the Problem Starts

JMHO

 

For some reason I keep reading this thread even though the spelling of "Disgusting" bothers me for some odd reason. It is spelt with 2 cc's in other forms of English and I'm off?

Obviously the guys' action to get so drunk is disturbing, but it seems no one knows the guy personally so assumptions are made that he is an alcoholic which most commenters (including myself) are not qualified to make that diagnosis. Perhaps the stress of his wife's hospital stay, accompanied with living 4 hours away led to a want to be around other expats, made the guy over indulge...maybe the guy hadn't had a drink in years. I can't say as well as most I'd be willing to guess.

Most troubling, why did someone not stand up and try to get him on a trike and back to where he needed to be earlier? Obviously we are not responsible for other peoples actions, but condemning someone while sitting back is pretty sad. A couple dollars worth of peso to get the guy out is a small price to pay. If an attempt was made and he told you to walk off, then you did what you could do.

Coming up in the military and the 10 years since I retired I have made sure folks have gotten home before they got themselves in trouble more times than I can count. Not so much in the Philippines as I do not hang out late around Dumaguete, but even coming back to Korea a few months ago I took it upon myself to get an US contractor out of a bar and into a taxi before he got his drunk a$$ beat down for being stupid, did not know the guy and from what I saw he was a complete f***head. I ended up drinking for free the rest of the night from both other customers and bar staff; and I was able to quietly walk myself to my hotel...

I do not know of any culture where it is acceptable to put your feet on a table at a restaurant...that is just wrong. How many times have folks been at a movie at Robinsons and found some locals feet up next to the seat you are sitting? A few more times than I've seen in other places and that has made me voice my "opinion" on that to them. Same with planes with pretty much every country, that one really gets me twisted.

We need to police ourselves when we are out and about, more so when living/working abroad. It is not my point in this reply to say that anyone needs to put themselves in a position where an idiot would want to cause you harm or be belligerent towards but maybe a bit of a talk and help can get someone where they are not going to make a fool of themselves and add to the impression all expats are drunks and looking for the shady side of the Philippines.

Shawn

 

Brian...family is one of those things that leads to so much debate, both good and bad.

There is a ton of negative things about immediate family and kin coming out of the woodwork, not to mention friends and such that make things interesting once someone has a "foreigner", a term I hate. Mileage will vary but at the end of the day the benefits of family has ended up being more positive than negative for us. Not ideal many times and after all these years I am still trying to understand things, which I doubt I ever will.

It would be cool to get some folks together, different backgrounds and such and do a guys b*tch session about all the unique things about being with a Filipina and what all that entails.

Also agree with JP's reply...had many conversations with him on some of the same things since I've known him.

I know this got away from the original post and would probably be better in another thread...

Shawn