How much do you pay your full time helper?

Most times she ate our food, which was ok with us. We also bought all of her toiletry items and whatever she needed.

 

We paid her Phil Health, additionally, she got quite ill and we asked if she had been exposed to TB. She that she had been exposed back home, so we had blood tests and doctor visits related to that. She did receive TB medication and recovered. So, we had quite a few, more costly expenses related to her medical needs.

 

This is a major problem here - with family primarily and also with employees if that is given as a benefit or if the employer is just a good person. The big dilemma is when do you withdraw funding? I know an ex-pat who spent over P2million on a heart condition - he funded it with his own resources and some help from friends but what if that condition was suffered by a family member or an employee or someone we really like, especially if a Filipino with no resources. Hope I never have to face that point.

 

This is one of my biggest fears be it a maid or family of the lady. Most of us aren't cold hearted even for a maid so we want to help but some of these issues can rack up costs insanely fast and some are just hopeless other then extending the life for months or 1-2 years like cancer as most here wouldn't get diagnosed until its pretty late to start treatments for effects. When to draw the line and act be that cold hearted *sshole ask they won't accept that either your not made out of money, its just a futile waste of money as nothing can really be done, and so on. I'm not ready to bleed myself dry for such things or put myself in massive debt just because I can get big credit lines.

 

I have had to watch Family members/friends here die from Leukemia (early 20's lady) Liver Failure (toddler) Stroke and Heart Attack (young and elderly) Dengue (child) Childbirth (young Mother and child) etc... After a while you seem to become hardened to it, but it does still affect you somewhat.

One was an 18 month old Baby. When I noticed his yellow eyes and skin I told the mother to take him straight to a Doctor. She said she had already done that, and that the Dr said it was normal. NOT to me! I insisted! Several months later, the baby became ill, and so she took him back to the Medical Centre, who referred her to a Specialist. Liver failure... He died a few months later. We gave money to help but could not afford the life saving operation nor the ongoing medication needed after a Liver replacement...

We gave money to try and help the young woman receive pain medication. We are not flash with cash, so it was too little too late. It is hard. What can you do? Bleed yourself dry?

In all honesty; if I were to fall seriously ill, I could neither afford treatment nor would I expect anyone to help, so I accept if I do fall seriously ill, then come what may. It is what it is here, we cannot live forever nor can we help everyone who does fall ill... This is life here in the Philippines, something that we all need to accept for what it is.

 

I knew a 71 year old American with a wife of 5 years and a couple of kids, living in Liloan on a minimal budget. When the wife or kids were sick he would take them to Cebu North Gen Hospital in Talamban and get them the best treatment he could afford. When he got sick he was too cheap to go there. He went to the poorest, provincial hospital in the area - and died there. Point is, take care of yourself first so you are around longer to take care of your loved ones.

 

Perhaps he wished to conserve his funds for the care of his younger family and so sacrificed himself. Another difficult call.

 

You have suffered seeing much loss Brian. This one particularly shocks me as we all know yellow skin (jaundice) is a very strong indicator of liver failure in all but neonates and surely a liver function test could have been done.

I have very great admiration Brian for your kindness - sometimes it is those who have least who give the most.

 

One of my Brothers In-law has Yellow eyes also, very dark yellow. No matter how many times I have expressed my concern, I am told he has been like this since a child and I am wrong. His skin is not yellow but the whites of his eyes are, that concerns me very much, but a visit to 'Dr Quack-Quack' and all is fine again with the world. I have offered for him to go to a Specialist but he declines saying everything is fine. Frustrating.