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Supporting Your SO

Discussion in 'Expat Section' started by Obliged Friend, Apr 21, 2019.

  1. Obliged Friend

    Obliged Friend DI Forum Adept Veteran Army

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    Wondering the percentage of foreigners in the Philippines who are providing financial support for their gf’s or partners children and her family.

    Do foreigners here have more biological children or “step children”?
     
  2. Roadwitch80

    Roadwitch80 DI Member

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    I actually don’t understand why people who come to the Phils for a “fresh start” would choose to burden themselves with a responsibility like multiple stepkids and multiple families to support in a new country. It must be the true, true, true love that movies are made of, cause otherwise it wouldn’t make sense.
     
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  3. Rye83

    Rye83 with pastrami Admin Secured Account Highly Rated Poster SC Connoisseur Veteran Army

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    Who said anything about a "fresh start"?
     
  4. ShawnM

    ShawnM Living the dream, Plan B ★ No Ads ★ Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Blood Donor Veteran Air Force

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    I would guess more than that would own up to. I personally have a 12 year old "step" son that I've known since he was 2...never use the "step" thing as I'm the only father he has known and have loved him as my own from day one.

    Money/support for family will make its way there one way or another. I sold my mother a house in the US for $1 as I've cleared out my ties; she sold it a few months later and that money is in her pocket as she needed it more than me...most help our families one way or another.

    Shawn
     
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    Last edited: Apr 21, 2019
  5. Roadwitch80

    Roadwitch80 DI Member

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    I actually know quite a few. And I didn’t say every foreigner here came looking for a fresh start, but I know some who did and came here with a backpack and ended up with a baggage of the multiple extended family kind. I always ask them why, and they tell me it’s because of love. Crazy little thing called love, emphasis on the crazy. But that’s just me and my usual three servings of judgey.
     
  6. danbandanna

    danbandanna DI Forum Patron Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Veteran Marines

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    “You live by yourself for a stretch of time and you get to staring at different objects. Sometimes you talk to yourself. You take meals in crowded joints. You develop an intimate relationship with your used Subaru. You slowly but surely become a has-been.”
    ― Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance
     
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  7. OP
    OP
    Obliged Friend

    Obliged Friend DI Forum Adept Veteran Army

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    “The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.”
    Pascal

    There was an Australian man married a Filipina who had a child fathered by a Filipino man who ran away after the pregnancy.

    The Australian man..would not permit the child in his house. He stayed with his grandparents.

    The Australian man had a biological daughter with his wife. He provided for her support.

    When a young male lion takes over a pride of female lions...the older lion..if he’s not killed or run off....usually becomes the baby sitter for the new lion cubs.

    How many older foreigners are...the babysitters.

    Viewing dating sites the Filipina mostly seeks an older foreigner in the Philippines but...when they are living in the Western countries they seek younger men. Why is that?
     
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    Last edited: Apr 22, 2019
  8. Happy Camper

    Happy Camper DI Senior Member Restricted Account Infamous Showcase Reviewer

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    Been there done that and not just once. Doing it again, last one is almost finished with college. They were presented with an opportunity. Yes it is out of love, and the fact fact that I can afford it easily enough. I didn't want a "fresh start", just someone to share my life with. On with the last chapter of the book of my life, just don't know how long the chapter is, but so far it has been a wonderful read.

    Would I do it again? Yes. Do I want to do it again? No, that would mean that I lost someone who is very precious to me.
     
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  9. Rye83

    Rye83 with pastrami Admin Secured Account Highly Rated Poster SC Connoisseur Veteran Army

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    My biological father died when I was an infant and my step father (dad) stepped up and filled that father role. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a man doing this. I would argue it takes an even bigger man to step up and be a good role model and father figure for a child that isn't his biological child. It is a very admirable trait IMO. I'm glad my dad didn't see me as extra "baggage".
     
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  10. Roadwitch80

    Roadwitch80 DI Member

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    It is very admirable. But this is the Philippines. Here, we don’t talk about adopting one kid when you marry a Filipina. Here, it is three kids PLUS her extended family, not even her immediate. And I know I am being judgey, but what you are citing as an example is rarely what happens here. I don’t call it admirable anymore when I see an old guy having to house all his young wife’s relatives in their house. He has to pay not just for his adopted kids, but her niece’s and nephew’s education as well. And fix her aunt’s roof and so on and so forth. I no longer find that admirable. He is being taken extreme advantage of, and I find it really uncomfortable to see. I just don’t understand why men put up with that, and yes, yes, yes, I know it’s none of my business, after all, it’s his money, he can do what he wants with it, but on a government pension, why even put up with it that was just the point I was trying to make. Not like Phils is on a chick drought.
     
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