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I'm not a practitioner of hippy, new ageism so I don't know what their argument would be for non-violence.

Here are my own points.

1) Unless I'm interested in watching someone be a total @ss and to potentially witness a fight, then I'm leaving as soon as this person begins to become a centerpiece for my night at the bar. I get that you don't always want to leave every time someone is being an @ss. For me, that's has increasingly been reality though. As I get older, I have less tolerance for this sort of thing.

2) The first item largely only happens in places which allow this to happen. Things can happen quickly, but ownership which is vigilant in setting the culture of the bar and enforcing strict rules goes a long way in preventing this sort of thing. This is easier done in a small bar, but with good staff it can happen in a large bar as well. You act on bad behavior quickly. You eject people who are being obnoxious. You ban people who are regularly a problem. You set the tone that bad behavior will not be tolerated.

3) I'm not anti-violence. Police have to use force to do their job. Force is violence, though a pro will attempt for the violence to be controlled. I support the U.S. government participating in armed conflicts. I loved how Richard Marcinko (claims to be the founder of the so-called "Seal Team 6") described how his team used the idea of "a monopoly of violence" to take control of a situation.

The movie, Roadhouse, comes to mind here. Be nice until it's time to stop being nice. Bad actors will get removed from the bar with necessary force. Force implies violence. But this violence should be carried out by a pro charged with the task to do this. It should not be carried out by customers, especially those who are pissed off and drunk.

4) I'm more interested in risk management than non-violence. Violence is highly chaotic and dangerous. I have much more important things to deal with than getting into fights. Bob acting like an *sshole isn't my problem to solve in this world. I'm not concerned with local drama and I just want to stay well clear of if. I don't need for a situation I could have avoided to result in me having to deal with medical or legal issues. I have too many things going on and I couldn't fit that headache into my life. I try to pick my battles wisely and a Whynot scuffle is not a wise decision for me.

5) I realize that some bars are far more violent than Whynot. I feel that a bar is a culture and fighting can sometimes be an extension of that culture. I have had so many friends get into fights for the silliest reasons. Eventually I figured out that they simply loved to fight and the silly reasons were actually a code. Again, the ownership needs to take control of the culture.

6) While you make a good case for the reasons that the actions were justified here, often the situation isn't as clear cut. Often these actions against assholes are based on factors such as how much the would be hero has had to drink and emotions. Rather than attempt to figure out if I'm making the right decision, I use the points above as a heuristic (rule of thumb.) It boils down to - pass the problem off and get the f*ck out of dodge before the guns start blazing.

We're cool now. Interestingly, info from the night you witnessed all this never reached me. I didn't know who was involved when I read your post. I didn't intend to point out anyone specific as this isn't info which would change my position on the subject.

I appreciate you taking the more realistic side here. Act like this *sshole in 100 random bars through the world and you will end up on the floor in a large percentage of them.

 

Prayers for a fast recovery

 

A skinny Pillar or perhaps known as cosmetic Pillars are not seen and usually they are half a hollow block wide and only 5 inch deep and are then like everything else in a CHB house they are frosted over with the cake icing (render) never to be seen again, they are worse than useless, if they are done the right way (but never are) they should be the whole width of a Block but still they only have sheer strength in the width and nothing in the skinny 5inch depth, 32cm pillars are the real deal if they have a mix of 4500PSI and have ratio of 140KG of steel per cubic metre of concrete, done the right way in one continuous pour! but this again is never done, usually they are poured in three sections, thus they will have cold joints between the sections, however as you say you will never know?

One very sound piece of advice I can give you though is; get the Feck out of a CHB house at the least sign of a tremor, a paid up funeral plan is not a bad idea either. Fact; in an Earthquake when people are killed, usually it is by falling Masonry.

I know it is not what you want to hear, but it is MY belief that very few houses here are built correctly and very few will stand the test of time?

 

There is usually no single way, but it depends on the level of anxiety. Someone facing an exam or a job interview usually suffers anxiety and that is NORMAL IN THE CIRCUMSTANCES. That would tend to fade away and the person does not think about it again. BUT, if the person experiences anxiety in many other situations, especially ones where most people do not, then that person has learned something that is normal (i.e. low-level anxiety in certain situations IS normal) but is applying it in a way that is not helpful. The person just has WRONG LEARNING - that person is not crazy. And there is no point listening to people who say "just pull yourself together" as those people would not say that to a person with a broken arm and so they have stigmatised psychological issues - their opinion on the subject is ill-informed thus pointless and worthless.

The person with this wrong learning needs to correct it. The first step would be to learn how to relax (as relaxation is the opposite of anxiety) and there is much on the internet about that. IMO the process should initially be one of muscle relaxation and when that is achieved to bring in correct breathing (especially to stop chest breathing and learn to replace it with abdominal breathing) and then visualisations (being able to imagine a scene where the person feels very happy and relaxed) and mindfulness (focusing on the moment to stop distracting thoughts). This can then be combined with anchoring (where just pressing the forefinger and thumb together becomes associated with relaxation) and that can then be used in stressful situations (best if it can be done during the apprehensive stage and before the anxiety becomes panic).

The process of facing anxieties is something a person would then do - but I am not a fan of strong exposure therapy (this is called 'flooding' and is where the person is persuaded to face the anxieties full on) but of a more gradual approach. IMO, it is better to take months to start to feel better than to rush it and go backwards.

All of this requires effort - but then, sportspersons work long hours day after day, week after week, month after month in gruelling repetitive exercises and sometimes just to win a medal. A person with a physical disability may have to carry out daily exercises, sometimes painfully, and has to accept it and do the best possible. So a person with wrong learning may need to put much effort into correcting it (even if not 100% then any progress is a success) and there are books available and resources on the internet. As with any learning system, there are different approaches and it is best to read about them and find what most suits the individual - IMO, that means being comfortable with the ideas and pacing it to suit. There is NO magic bullet (there rarely is for anything) and trying to find it just postpones facing the situation and correcting the wrong learning. Facing anything that causes suffering is not easy, but the long-term rewards are usually worth it.

One of the big factors is to learn to ACCEPT the feelings - they were not asked for but they exist - and not fight them. Acceptance is really the key but usually needs a bit of effort initially to minimise some of the more distressing aspects of anxiety conditions.

Medications can be used in small amounts to help with the initial stages but this requires medical advice and prescription - over-use is not only dangerous but is just avoiding making the effort as described above and is a bit like a parent doing a child's homework (it solves the problem but the child learns nothing).

 

One thing that just really gets me is when people continue to spew this tired old meme of "99.9% have nothing more than a runny nose". Maybe you were just being hyperbolically sarcastic, but some will read that and think it's true. It is NOT.

The current case fatality rate in the Philippines is 2% (NOT 0.1%, you are low by a factor of 20X). AND ... 33% of positive covid patients, even if they don't die, end up with "long haul" symptoms including chronic fatigue, respiratory problems, brain fog, and liver and heart problems.

Nobody should be dismissing covid as "just the flu".

I know what you will say, so here:
https://health.ucdavis.edu/health-n...id-19-patients-regardless-of-severity/2021/03

 

Just an update. So when you arrive in Manila, you are swabbed and taken to the hotel of your choice, and within 24 hours, they give you your result back which was awesome so you don’t have to stay in Manila for that long as long as you’re negative. Within 72 hours, you need to exit Manila for your provincial destination where you will get quarantined for two weeks based on provincial IATF. If you get your results earlier than that, you are allowed to leave the hotel and will be escorted to your home where you’ll have to be under house arrest for the remaining time. Other than the nightmare of the documentary requirements, it wasn’t as bad as I expected.

 

You express the hope of a vaccine being available for everyone before we reach the point of overwhelmed hospitals. I share that hope, but.......
a. It looks likely that there will not be a vaccine available until somewhere in the first half of 2021 at the earliest;
b. People will probably need 2 shots each;
c. Don't underestimate the growing strength in numbers of "anti-vaxers" in many countries;
d. Many people live in countries where the government can not afford to pay for the vaccine, or even deliberately doesn't want to;
e. Production capacity for a vaccine will be limited even if new factories are being rushed to completion already now (estimates differ, but it seems unlikely that more than 1 to 2 billion doses will be available in the first year of production)

So in all honesty I am not confident at all that this problem is going to go away any time soon. It may for some (those who can get their hands on an effective vaccine), but for a large majority it seems more likely that covid will remain a dominant issue in their lives for a much longer period.
My thinking is that by the end of next year it seems likely that most of the usual suspects (North America, Europe, Japan, South Korea, Singapore, the rich part of the Middle East and Australia/New Zealand, maybe Moscow and the biggest cities in China) will have vaccinated a large majority of their population at least once. Other countries will be lucky to have enough vaccine to protect staff at hospitals and other essential workers. The rest of the population will have to wait, and if a rational decision is taken they'll vaccinate kids and teachers before seniors (who generally aren't productive anyway and can be told to stay home without causing much economic damage). For most people in Africa, South and Middle America and poorer countries in Asia this thing may drag well into 2023.

 

i like tikis in the house, they keep the insect population down and provide entertainment for me. they've learned to come when i call out tiki tiki tiki like you would call a cat.

some hang out on the stovetop under the grates and wait for me to feed them small bits of ground meat on my fingertip, they're not afraid of a cooking vessels placed over him or the piezoelectric igniter or the burner flame.

they'll try to snitch bits of food when i'm prepping dinner or take a sip of my evening cocktail. i wasn't watching once and found a tiki tail poking out of my kaluá drink; guess he had too much to drink.

there's several that follow me from the kitchen to my desk and stalk me for food. one tiki hangs out under my keyboard and comes out for bits of tiki snacks that i put on a spoon for it. it also, licks the condensation on a cup.

the tukos knock things over and are too big to be indoor pets.

it's more fun in the fils...

 

No, this conspiracy theory is sometimes mentioned in the US news. Most people have heard these ravings just as they have heard about UFO’s and little green mensevretlymeeying with President Trump. American, European and other research organizations have funded studies in the Wuhan lab; it is common to pay for research and it is quite a prominent facility. There are laws about transporting bio materials and a few people were caught doing that but such material did not include bio weapons. They break the law to expedite their work. It is not common for foreign researchers to pay for bioweapons development or viruses that cause pandemics; they are usually trying to formulate new vaccines and the like for useful and peaceful purposes. A few nutbags buy into the conspiracy theories you are implying but not many, even the anti-Trump news media. The Chinese have also funded studies in the US and other locations sophisticated enough to have level 4 security bio-labs. Not many if those exist in the world. Most people do not believe that China or anybody else intentionally released a virus to take over the world, or reduce the population of a new world order lol. Such people need to be locked up with the people who have been accosted by aliens from Area 52 while sleeping. And Bill Gates is not trying to create demand for a vaccine so he can plant microchips into everyone. And that is not the mark of the beast. Lol.


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No matter there's a law, which forbid, when enforcement is lacking, any law is just a paper tiger.