⌛ improve or not?

Hello everyone. Allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Louis and as my name implies, I am from England, U.K.
I am going to be 60 next April and have two 30 + kids in U.K. and two grandchildren. I worked for 38 years before taking early retirement from train driving.
Before I start, let me assure you that I have no intention to cause offence to anyone. The views expressed are my own and I'm not racist, being Jewish I can't afford to be.
Ok , so here goes.
I am here in the Philippines through a number of circumstances. I eventually met the light of my life here and decided to stay. She has two kids.
I am now raising a partly inherited family here. We have one of our own.
Generally speaking I am happy here and want to be here.

However, I am rather confused about attitudes here so maybe some of you can help me out.
Coming from England I am used to a very different way of life, one that encompasses safety, hygiene and consideration for others. Ok I accept that is idealistic, but you get the idea.

I have been coming here for long periods since 1998 and have been a full time resident since 2006.

So here is my problem.
Try as I may, i can't seem to adapt to the lack of consideration Filipinos have for anyone. Please remember I am not out to offend, simply to understand ,so don't get upset with me.

On the roads you have no discipline. You drive right up to each other till you can feel the breath of your opponent and see the blacks of their eyes. Then someone will give in.
The bus drivers terrify me at times. With them it's either foot all the way down or foot up. no inbetween. I spent twenty years driving buses so I do know what safe, comfortable driving is about.
Same with your music. Everywhere I go the volume is full.
People burn stuff everyday and make lots of unhealthy smoke that obscures vision and damages health.
Where I live, the family next door have roosters, dogs, pigs, goats chickens and loud tv and music. In a residential area. The smoke from his dirty kitchen comes over the wall and into my bedroom. I have installed a fan to blow it away. This family think only of themselves.

To put a positive face on this I will now reveal that I am a Rotarian and have worked with many selfless Filipinos. Many men and Women who, like me, give time and money to help others. We ask no thanks other than to thank God for their blessings. We couldn't do what we do without his divine help.

For us, the look on a child's face after a hairlip operation and she sees she is beautiful for the first time in her life, well that's immeasurable.

The point I'm trying to make is that many of you are very considerate and I respect and admire you, but others leave me in despair.


My good friend who you all know but will remain nameless at present, tells me that lack of money is at the root of this behaviour. He tells me the same as some Filipinos have, I am a visitor here technically and if I don't like it, I am free to leave.
I know that but is it the answer. When I lived between two churches in Bulacan, the noise from the loudspeakers during holy week can only be described as a cacophony. I had a large house there and was very well known. when I asked one church leader to turn the mic volume down a little. she told me ," you are a rich man, this is our tradition, if you don't like it, you rent a room in a hotel in Manilla for this week"

I guess most of you will think she is right, but is consideration for others wrong,? is it a thing of the past,? is it necessary to yell through a microphone at 4.30 am when people are trying to sleep.? What about workers who need their sleep, how about the sick and dying who need peace and quiet.? How about the parents who have been up half the night with a sick baby and have finally got him to sleep.?

Well they are some of my views.
I would like to repeat that I am not out to make enemies or offend, I just want to understand. Consideration for others really does make for a better world.
The end

 

Welcome

I guess your question is more directed at Phillipino's here

Seems a common complain also from Phillipino's, the holy week is maybe a bad example since that is an important cultural thing. I don't really think that Filipino's are much more inconsiderate but maybe in the UK the social make-up is different.

Ppl of certain wealth, 'social class' and and age tend to hug more together and in settling/buying a house somewhere they are more aware what neigbourhood go live in.

There was a discussion about middle class earlier here with a spanish man who will move to Duma soon. Living in western europe we are used to live between 'our kind of ppl' (at a certain age) if we got the financial means.

Being older makes you less tolerant as well of course

 

Thanks for your early response Arie. I guess being in the upper age bracket does make me less tolerant, but living here and bringing up my ten month old son, and two other boys, is sure teaching me patience. lol

 

To be straight about this.

The Filipino’s like loud music and TV. They love it but remember these things are still new to them it wasn’t that many years ago they didn’t have them. My wife bought her families first TV and Stereo in 2001. And many Filipino Families still don’t have these things. We have always had them. It has become part of their culture. People hear this and think oh they have things, they are prosperous. If you’re wife is a little fat they think you’re rich because you can afford to feed her. You can go to the local barangay and see little children standing in front of other people’s homes watching TV because they still don’t have one in their home. Life is very hard for many people they have few luxuries. Remember eating more than once a day for many is a luxury. We have had them for so many years we have a proper and improper way to use them. Bus drivers or as I like to call them kamikazes buses just watch out and stay out of their way. Like the electrical Items, motorized vehicles are new items. So you know where I am going with that. I not saying all Filipinos are like this. Now the rich and educated Filipinos live in housing areas for the rich and educated they don’t deal with these problems. If you want to live with the regular Filipino’s you will have to live as they do even some of them don’t like it but there is nothing that can be done. This is just my opinion.

 

maybe it's loud to drown out someone elses TV or load music, or chicken or dog or or or................

 

Hi teach, not all filipinos like loud music. My sisters are surrounded with small
houses with karaoke, TV, stereo etc., but they manage to keep the music down so as not to disturb neighbors, and they are well respected.

 

Sorry Louis but I don't understand your problem.
As you stated you have visiting PI for 10 years but where were you staying?
From the 7 years I have visited PI, outside of Manila, what you are experiencing is the norm, unless you live or stay on a very large Lot.In which case you would make your own noise from domestic animals anyway.
As "one younger man to another" go with the flow and don't become a grumpy young man there's plenty of them around already !.......regards john

 

Of course this is a problem elsewhere too. In the U.S. you don't want to live in college neighborhoods or in heavy drug neighborhoods. Some cities allow farm animals in certain areas but not in others. In my neighborhood we have a housing association with somewhat strict rules of what you can do or can't do around your house. The benefit of this is that property values are higher and people can live in nice neighborhoods.

 

if I can choose to live my life there be no if's to say..

I'd like to tackle a few topics mention by the thread starter TS :D

Philippine road problem??

 

Louis, most of what you had posted are very true and still significant in certain places in the Philippines where houses are built too close to each other and people thriving in these places are the less fortunate ones... They don't have much to spend on luxuries. And it's very sad.:o :( :o

Now, you have two choices in here, either you keep living in this place and adopt the circumstances or.... you can move to a more decent and private place where there's no more smoke and smell of fried dried fish that contaminates your house.

It's your call and only you who can decide. Be smart....