⌛ Live with g/f vs live alone

I am in a state of confusion. I am preparing to move to the Philippines soon and have some very important decisions to make. I have been divorced since this past December. I was in the Philippines for 5 weeks this past May. Part of my trip was focused on exploring the possibility of moving to the Philippines. Moving to the Philippines is something that I have wanted to do for a very very long time.

During my trip, I met a young lady from Biliran. She and I were together for the last two weeks of my visit and I have to say we had a great great time. I made a lot of promises regarding our living together when I returned but I am now debating with myself whether I should have her live with me or if I should just simply try living alone for a while. Part of the problem has to do with her desire to marry, have children and wanting to live near her family.

I will be 65 years old next month and was married to a filipina several years ago. I am quite familiar with the filipino family issues and really do not want to get caught up in that trap again. I have been married 4 times and feel like I need a break. And finally I have tried to explain to her that I have had a vasectomy and that a reversal would be far too expensive and something that I really do not want to do.

I have visited the Philippines around 15 times and am pretty confident that even at my age, meeting young ladies will not pose a big problem. I work out frequently and do not drink or smoke.

My plans are to try the Philippines for at least one year and see how it works out for me. I am lucky in many respects because I was living with a nice Thai lady for 3 1/2 years. She does not like the idea of my taking off but I have tried to explain that this is something I need to do. I just need to get it out of my system. I certainly do not expect for her to wait forever but for now I think I can return and have someone here.

This moving thing is not as easy and clear cut as I expected.

 

well, somehow it sounds that you answered your own question already.

you were talking about a lady showing you hand-cuffs after 2 weeks ? Hands Off, that sounds like 110% pinoy-drama even before living together !!
Take your break and enjoy this wonderful country.

 

If you arent feeling it, dont do it..

 

Not meaning to be harsh, but it sounds like you may have led this lady on? If she is wanting to marry, make babies, and to be close to her family, and that is not on your agenda, you should have expressed that at the time, not talked about moving in together when you came back.

If you are not ready to settle down with one girl, chances are the relationship will fail if you try it anyway.

Do what you want to do, not what someone else wants you to do. But try to explain it as you go, so as not to hurt others by giving them great expectations and false hopes along the way.

Larry

 

Greetings boricua,

Question, If you're 65, then why do you feel you have to meet and marry a "young lady"?

If you've already been married (and I assume divorced) 4 times, then why aren't you just looking for the "right lady"?

Yes, you can find ridiculously young girls that will marry you here, but if that's your big prerequisite, then don't expect an issue-free relationship.

Try living alone here for 6 months, just go about your daily life here and see what the big guy upstairs sends your way.

You might be pleasantly surprised.

 

Well said i agree 100%, just come over and see what life has in store for you, but as Larry said please don't say you will live with a girl, unless you know that's what you want, as these girls cling on to what you tell them.

Alan

 

Ditto, I second thee.... Take a break, You've earned it especially after being married 4 times....

 

A four time loser.... the fifth will just be the same. Be real. You'll always be a loser no matter where you are.. be it in the Philippines or somewhere.

 

Ouch !!!! That comment is a long way below the belt and completely out of order.

 

Boricua,
I was thinking the same thing as Rhoody...sounds like you already know the answer.
Do the both of you a favor. Tell her you made a mistake and nip it in the bud quickly and completely.