Best Posts in Thread: Please gentleman, have some patience, understanding and respect of the local culture!

On two occasions in the last week I have witnessed an expat being disrespectful, rude and aggressive towards the local staff in a supermarket. For very minor reasons (I won't go into the details as it's not really relevant) the two men started finger pointing, raising their voices, and hurling insults towards the staff such as "you have no brain!", "you're an idiot" and "why are all Filipinos so stupid?"

One shop assistant was actually in tears, the other close to tears. On both occasions I felt it necessary to apologize on behalf of their behaviour and explain they were being unreasonable and not to worry about it or take it personally.

Please please can we all try and be patient and more understanding. Have you no appreciation of the "saving face" culture here? The staff are just acting under instructions and doing their best.

I was, quite frankly, both embarrassed and disgusted by what I saw. I condone violence but must confess I felt an overwhelming desire to punch them!

I truly hope not many locals think this is how foreigners behave here. Remember we are guests in their country and the people here are generally extremely welcoming, friendly and hospitable. I hope this doesn't change because of idiots like these........

 

I witnessed a foreigner verbally attacking a sales associate at Lee Hypermart several years ago. I felt horribly for the girl and I did feel obligated to apologize to her for his behavior. I told her I was so sorry how he spoke to her and that we aren't all like that. She smiled and said, "Thank you, ma'am". If people are that unhappy living in a country not their own, then they should go back. The visitors should never expect the host country to change their ways to accommodate them, they should be appreciative of their hospitality.

 

Nothing wrong with letting them know of your displeasure. Many times it is not about what you say, it's more how you say it.

 

Makes me wonder why some expats are so quick tempered. Filipinos are, by nature, slow people and those not used to this slowness usually lose their temper. You have to remind yourself that you are no longer in USA or wherever is your place of origin. Welcome to the Philippines!

 

I have had the same experience several times as you Mark, I try to talk to the rude expats in a polite way, maybe you have a bad day but it's not the fault of the staff, but empty eyes, no understanding, you can't fix stupid

 

Ve

Good post. I've been here over 7 years and twice I've felt compelled to apologize on their behalf after witnessing the rudeness. Both times it was appreciated by the locals.

 

There are two sides to this story, I certainly agree that chewing out or berating a sales person is very poor judgement but sometimes I understand its hard to keep your mouth shut. Sunday a bunch of locals were on the beach in front of my house. No problem but when they came on to my property and started throwing their garbage all over then climbing up tree's and tearing branches off so they could have a fire to cook something on I had a word with them. " Please pick up your garbage and take it home with you, it is not my job to pick up after you. I have no problem with you being here because I see the beach next door is so filthy and full of human feces and plastic bags. Also please refrain from tearing branches of my Talisay tree's that I planted here 30 plus years ago.. Thank you. ANSWER f*ck you Joe.. so I blew a gasket and told them all to get out and never come back or I will charge them with trespassing and call the police.

 

When i first lived in dgte 6 years ago it lived up to its name : the city of gentle people. 8 years later here I am back but its not the same place I left. I have always found
All Filipinos, the kids and indigenous families to be good people welcoming respectful and
Kind. And any expat who insults shames or shouts profanities at anyone in the service or retail business is simply an ahole and should be ignored.
While I'm still convinced that the majority even more say, 80%
Are of that temperment sad to say the rest IMO are being willingly westernized too.
Ive been happily married to a filipina and have our own 2 kids btw a major factor is because the culture here is better for raising a family than anywhere in the states.
However,unfortunately I've noticed since Ive been back that the ugly expats have not had the best influence on some of the natives either. Money begets greed and envy sometimes. New found wealth albeit modest, and the obessive (sp) tech compulsion to buy but buy or selfie selfie me ruined a generation back west n is now doing it here
Cebu and Makati now resemble modern day indutrailized micro cities like NY or Tokyo. Never saw it so bad traffic congestion n more n more money grabbers born everyday
But not all good has changed in 6 years here either.
If you've ever been quoted a ridiculous fare 70 pesos because im foreign to go 3 km, almost run over or always cut off by many riders than youll know what im talking about. One thing that really irks me is line cutting.
Thats something that ill call someone out on. Happens too much here. I was taught and my wife is same way n my kids will 2
Manners are more impotant than laws or money.
Ive decided the culture is foreig too fast here getting to corrupted by the westerners here not to mention the absurd prices ppl place on their homes
Double what it was 6 years ago same house more depreciation double the price. Go figure. Greed begets greed too. Blame it on us but if your not part of the solution then your part of the problem too.
I'm not wealthy if i were i would help all the street kids but I'm also not stupid enough to get ripped off on a house thats already maxed out appreciation 6 years ago.
Happens all time back in old countries.
So i decided its time next year to move to my wife family province before i wind up in an accident -
This place is too small to hold all these ppl n traffic- with some uuninsured no regard no helmut young pinoy or lola who cant swerve to avoid me. So I prefer to walk and watch another commercial or condo project spring up every month.
otherwise always loved dgte when im gone dont lose all your charm

 

I have lived here in the Philippines for a few years and my personal experience has been that employees vary from store to store... the work culture in some stores is more professional than in other stores. In the stores where the employees are all about the employees (music playing loud and ignoring customers) then I do not do business there... I just leave and go somewhere else. But for a foreigner to be intolerant of the work culture within a store and to explode on a store clerk is totally incorrect... they should simply leave and go somewhere else.