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Best Posts in Thread: I'm leaving the Philippines

  1. Notmyrealname

    Notmyrealname DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer

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    Not sure if you have so many 'Likes' Dave because you said you are leaving or the other content! :smile:

    But you have done wonders - which most of us could not even start on. You built a house here without previous experience (although I know you are a very good craftsman in general and quite a perfectionist) and tackled every problem by research and deep thinking. You have developed methods which the rest of us have learned from.

    You have experienced the problems of working with locals who, mostly through no fault of their own, have not had opportunities to develop the necessary skills. As you have pointed out, cheap rates of pay are illusory when you add in the time factor and the need for remedial work (perhaps costing in new materials as well as further labour).

    Now you made a decision based on the best needs of your family here - to be able to provide for them but from a distance. A brave decision to make and one which can be done only by a person who really cares. Anyone who knows you has not the slightest doubt about your devotion to your son - this is the case, I must add, with many other expats parents (I won't name the ones I know of as it would seem I am excluding others - but you all know who you are). I often reflect on what expats bring to this country and how the government really has not grasped it in its underlying dislike of foreigners. Perhaps things will change.

    A pity you are going as your advice to house builders here would be very valuable - but you have offered to give advice to anyone who contacts you and I hope people take you up on that as you are a goldmine of information and technique.

    For anyone thinking the same way, you all know almost everything in life is reversible and so over time it is fine to change the mind and come back. I am sure the RT in Valencia would be pleased to have your money (oops! I forgot that you are a Scotsman - but that is a joke as one thing I know about you very well is your generosity). You are always so willing to spend time giving advice, offering direct help and providing things people need - this is done without hesitation.

    So, whatever you do in the future is obviously the best decision you made - as you are a thinker - and so we all wish you the best. You will be a loss but fortunately that marvellous creation - the internet - means you will always be in touch.
     
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  2. DAVE1952

    DAVE1952 DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer

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    I don't know.
    I have decided I will no longer live here for the long term and packing up to get ready to return home, building a house here has been much more costly than I ever imagined it to be? I have gone way over budget to build this, used up all my savings and have started to dip into my emergency fund to get the house ship shape before going home.

    Building a bespoke house and expecting Pinoy workers to adapt to something other than which they know has been a big problem during the course of this build, having said that I'm not so sure they can be depended on to really know what they are doing building here with the standard CHB method, on the face of it labour here is cheap P350 to 450 a day depending on skill level, but in reality you are paying 3 times that much for the amount of work they do, they are just so inefficient at their jobs in just about everything they take 3 times longer than a tradesman in the western world would, then there is mistakes to be corrected of which there is many, which leads to added costs for labour and extra material.

    I am selling up most of my construction tools which includes a cement mixer and a host of other tools, many related to carpentry.

    I have a young son here of 4yrs and I will provide support for him and his mother, but now I can only come back for short term visits only, perhaps with holiday insurance? having had some minor health problems in recent times has made me realise living here without a reasonable emergency fund is out of the question, fortunately I still have a hoose back in Bonnie Scotland, I have always known that at some point I must return home to live out the rest of my years and make use of the free health care there ( not free exactly I worked and paid into the system for 47yrs) only I did not expect to have to do this so soon?

    I have enjoyed my time here and building this house has given me a lot of pleasure, especially when I consider this very practical house fully insulated house, which is affordable for my wife and son to live in, come out of my own head, the carpentry work was all done with my own hands, never having built a house before this gives me so much satisfaction that I was able to do this for the family here, parting with my young son will be difficult for me, but circumstances are such that I have no option.

    It is highly likely that I will be on DI from time to time and if ever anyone wants some advice on Building here in the Philippines I may be able to give them some useful very sound well researched information, so I will not be offended if I get a PM regarding this.
     
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  3. DAVE1952

    DAVE1952 DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer

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    I don't know.
    I have a son in UK of 45yrs, whatever happens to me he will step in and do the right thing by the family here and especially so for his half brother, I know many will will be thinking where inheritance is involved this can change people we have all seen this many many times. when I lived in Mactan with my partner (we are not married) and she announced that she was pregnant, I had a couple of what I thought were good friends come to me to have a man to man talk and their advice was for me to F off, my reply to them was I cannot do this as my Son in UK would never forgive such an action by His Father, needless to say these friends were cut off from that day forth, social and family values have gone out of the window in many western 1st world countries, but I am a Scotsman my son is a Scotsman and we do the right thing by our family's, I would trust this boy with my life, he also gave life to his sister in the form of a transplant, unfortunately she died 5yrs later, also understand my son does not need my money he has a Hoose in London a good job, good wife and two children he wants for nothing.
     
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  4. DAVE1952

    DAVE1952 DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer

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    Thanks John, Dutchie is correct (he usually is on most things? Smart Basket that he is) in just about everything he has to say on this issue of mine, but at this time I must return home, that is 5 weeks I have been in my newly built house and for me there is much to admire about it, although it cost me more than I ever thought it would I think the end result is good and I am fairly pleased with it at the end of the day, it has turned out well considering I was never in the building trade and this has been a first for me. Overall I am fairly contented with the life I have here in the Philippines, my young son of 4yrs is a joy to be with although building the house has kept us apart much more than I wanted, I was on site 7 days a week from dawn till dusk, leaving this bundle of joy will be difficult for me we are together that much more now we have all moved into the new house, he has so much fun here and room to run around, unlike his older half brother he enjoys helping out and even asks for jobs to do.


    My hoose in Scotland is also a place I have enjoyed living in since I moved there in 1999, 4 yrs ago I was back in UK for a time thinking to get this ready to put on the market, sell up realise my assets and return to the Philippines to build a big Hoose and live happily ever after, so with this in mind I renovated the kitchen painted it inside and and outside and had it all looking spick and span, then one sunny morning I woke up and smelled the flowers, I decided then I'm never going to let that house go, to this day I think this decision was right for me, I need to return home to Scotland (I do sometimes miss the place) the house there will need some maintenance. Although it may seem less expensive for me to live here rather than me living in Scotland and still having to support the family here, I think I will be no worse off financially, I know my way around the kitchen and actually enjoy cooking for myself, on the rare occasions I do eat out I just go to Wetherspoons and eat their special which includes a free Beer, anyway the house in UK is an investment that I need to keep and maintain as an asset to the family here when I am gone, that more than anything else is so very important to me, what good would a big house be here in PI to my family when I am gone without any further financial input from me?

    Of course I will come back here to PI from time to time but likely it will only be for short term visits?

    Cheers

    Daved
     
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  5. Notmyrealname

    Notmyrealname DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer

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    I have never met your son but am in no doubt why you place so much trust in him. I hope you do not mind if I show this link to a Youtube video of him being interviewed after his 500 mile cycle ride from London to Fife (Scotland) on behalf of leukaemia research and his very modest attitude the video clearly shows.

     
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  6. john boy

    john boy DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster

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    Dave having also read " Part Two" of your personal story, I would say you have opened up with such frank and self honesty that many a man would not of admitted.
    It's true to say that at some point in time, most Expats have to make the decision to return home, in most cases it's health reasons.
    The last ten years of your life, you have done something many guy's will only dream of and that in itself is to admired.
    Many would not of provided a home for the Mother and child they were leaving behind, which I'm sure took some heart searching.
    From the little I have learnt about you, it seems that even now as you are about to leave, you have already planned provisions for the childs future.
    Things will no doubt work out for you in Scotland for the best, regarding your possible future health issues, you have my sincere respect. JB
     
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  7. cabb

    cabb DI Forum Patron Highly Rated Poster ✤Forum Sponsor✤

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    @DAVE1952 It's not clear to me why the it's best to leave your family in the Philippines. Is there some immigration issue with Scotland? I get the financial situation, but dividing the family is a bit confusing to me. In the examples, I am familiar with, this eventually turns out bad for the family left behind. Specifically once the husband passes away in a country for which the family has no legal standing. Why wouldn't you bring them with you? Is a family that exists in two different countries really a family? I guess I'm old fashioned. What happens to them if something happens to you? I'm assuming that they don't have Scottish citizenship.

    Good luck to you and your family!
     
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    Last edited: Mar 31, 2022
  8. Crystalhead

    Crystalhead ADMIN Admin ★ Forum Moderator ★ ★ Global Mod ★ ★ Moderator ★ ★★ Forum Sponsor ★★ ★ No Ads ★ Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Veteran Army

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    Sorry to hear this. Never know what the future holds so hope great things come your way and you find the path to return to your Family here.
     
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