Dating and Bringing Chaperone

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There's a lot of good advice given above. I will offer only this: Keep in mind that you are the catch. Unless she is a model-quality beauty or belongs to one of the 3 or 4 elite universities. And in both those cases, she will be in metro Manila (where the beautiful and the talented migrate, the New York and L.A. of the Philippines). So if she behaves rudely, and by bringing people uninvited, state your complaint and either send them away, or walk away yourself. There's a good chance she will soon be texting apologies.

 

I would like to share some few points on the side of the pinays, It is part of our BS culture that we sometimes requires chaperone during our first date or any kind of date.. whether its for a local or expat, some independent girls with dating experienced might go out on a date alone. But, a young girl of less than 30 years old from a small village needs a chaperone because they tend to be shy of what others would think about her…

About BS culture, Filipinos way of welcoming or gathering is not all conversations we share by food at home or dining outside, that’s also the reason why we have an endless yearly fiesta and etc… And, also 99% of the Filipino working abroad when they come home they spend their 1 month salary for dining outside or having a grand meal at home and shared with everyone.

Spending a few dollars in one time for food and drinks with the girl & her chaperone is not a turn off point, but if she has done it several times and with a battalion of friends then that’s another story.

For all of you young and old longnose guys you have to educate your GF, that your penny is a hard earned and its only enough for both of you not for the whole village!

I remember, I sent my super longnose bana in north Mindanao before getting my first kiss(even if I wasn’t a virgin anymore)… I told him to see my family and of course cousins of cousins and the whole village as well..but, I guess he understood about our shitty culture that I never told..the only thing I told him that I hate my country.

One of the cousin from a Class B (i'm class C) family asked him to bring some ice cream, so what he did is he bought a dirty ice cream from the street vendor which is 3peso per cone.. So my cousin phoned me(there was no facebook yet) of what happened and they have a doubt if my bana can afford me! And also they noticed that for 2 weeks he has only 2 or 3 pairs of clothes! My poor husband was on trial by cousin’s publicity…(of course he has loads of branded clothes and can afford me but he did not show it to me! and to the family and to the whole village.)

After 2 weeks of waiting in my shitty town frustrated… he told me(while I was still abroad) that he’s still willing to get to know me…he said he likes the mango..he likes the sea…and me! So I came! I gave up my job I let him pay my ticket and the rest was history.

 

And remember ther are 100 milion pinoys,so 50 mil
pinays,
so if not included the children and married and old onces
i asume there be at least 20 milion single gurls left
chose ur pick here

 

Yeah! and they remember this only until the round of wants and needs and the fact even you, use a term "Longnose" goes to prove somewhat how we are viewed by the Many.
I don't wish to appear derogative but to those many (maybe not all) if the cap fits wear it. Chaperons are one thing, the family Fiesta day out is another.
For me, Meet ( with your Cousin Aunt whoever) Talk, decide if you should meet again, You Do meet again with or without your Chaperon, talk some more,

AH! you like each other, Then and only then Go meet the family, The Rest is then in the hands and/or Pocket of the Suitor.

It worked for me and Azon's Chaperon was her Boss. After 4 days in Manila we decided we could make ago of this, We returned to Dumaguete, I funded a One Off Family Party to Introduce my self and those that were there just for the Food and Drink, are not even on My Christmas card List.

That's me.

JP

 

Well here is a little strange turn up for the books., My 19 year old nephew came up the other night to tell us that after some time, he had given into a Girl that has been pestering him for a date, She is a Filipino of 20 and at the same college. He said Uncle, I like this girl but.......... I am not sure about her, Will you come with me with Anty and meet her and tell me what you Think. We went last night and yes she was OK, Good English, Clean Tidy, Non Smoker little Alcohol intake. Thing that amazed us Both (Azon & I ) was that she seemed to be interrogating us as well as us her. Seems she is from a very well to do family, Doctor (Father) and Dentist( Mother) Now she also brought her Friend that although did not say too much was intent on listening to all that was said. So my posting this is merely to show that this Chaperoning thing can Work Both ways. There we were looking after His Interests and there was the Girl with her Chaperon Doing exactly the same thing. Looking after the Girls Interests

Always two sides to a Coin.

JP

 

As for my opinion u have to look both side, the girl safetiness to a strnger 1 is the most important, for me u dont hv to tell the guy that you bring a chaperon with u, the guy may feel awkward, its a lot of scary things happening of dating stranger, for me its better to bring some1 in ur first meeting with a guy but ur companion to be ur look up!!! He or she dont need to be in ur table, though i havent try to have a date with strsnger but for me thats the best way,

 

I totally agree with you here, That's what I was trying to say in my previous post, it is all too important on the initial date/meeting to have someone with you, as you say maybe not actually sat with you but for me it is a little better to have them sat with you as sometimes the wrong things can be said and misunderstandings arise, I as others may have, been a chaperon once or twice and felt the need to clarify somethings so that the both parties are aware that things said do not always have the same meaning. (Especially if it is a Pinay meeting a Foreigner)
As I said, all things have two sides (So to speak) It is to everyone's Advantage/Security/ Safety to not be on your own at these times (Unless one of you has an Ulterior Motive) { I think this is what the OP was getting at} Unless you have a Steady BF now, I guess there may be a First time you will try to date a stranger and/ or a Foreigner, then this Thread may remind you of safety checks you need to remember.

Anyway, it is nice to hear things from a Lady as we normally only get the male perspective on some things.

JP

 

Well its a bit off topic but my only connection with Asian Dating, Asian Beauty was when I caught why 'wife' looking for a boyfriend! Wish I had used a chaperone to warn me off her when we first met.