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How to lose friends in the Philippines

Discussion in 'Expat Section' started by charlyB, Jun 22, 2021.

  1. charlyB

    charlyB DI Forum Adept

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    This is a heads up for newcomers to the Philippines as expats who have been here a while would or should already know this.
    How to lose friends in the Philippines is simple LEND THEM MONEY because they will not pay it back and if you ask them to pay it back that's when YOU are becoming unreasonable, a strict foreigner, rich when they are poor and all the other things that are said.
    Its happened to me twice both times with relations of my wife who were actually friends.
    1st time was a female cousin, a hard working woman in her 50s no husband and one married daughter with a husband and they both have good jobs, the cousin had a motorbike crash and was in hospital about to get an operation, when the daughter found out the cost she instructed the mother be moved (with a broken leg) to a cheaper hospital, i said to my wife just lend her the money to get it done, all good the daughter thanked us and even asked for more money for another operation for her mother, i said ok, that was well over a year ago and only 30% of what we lent has been paid back and we don't seem to be so friendly anymore.
    2nd time, you might think once bitten twice shy but this time was a completely different situation although it was again a female cousin (seems to be a trend here) this woman was married to an American and flew in from the US without him to throw her family here a lifeline by starting a business for them to run , at the time we had a car to sell and she wanted to buy it, i gave her a good price and she wanted to pay it over 12 months, 1st payment no problem then the trouble starts, when asked why the second payment is missing she reveals that the purchase is between her and 6 siblings and now their turn to pay, to cut a long story short the most of the money was paid with maybe a few thousand short after lots of phone calls and unfriending on facebook.
    By the way when the woman went back to US the business failed and the car was broken.
    But lesson learned and no matter what the sob story the ATM is permanently closed to everyone.
     
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  2. Mike_Haddon

    Mike_Haddon DI Junior Member

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    Not my experience, but then I tend not to 'loan' money to relatives. If there's one in dire need we will help them out when we can. Have loaned to one friend and the money comes back each month like clockwork, so IMO can only speak as you find.
     
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  3. jimeve

    jimeve DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Veteran Army

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    Lending money over here means give.
     
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  4. Rye83

    Rye83 with pastrami Admin Secured Account Highly Rated Poster SC Connoisseur Veteran Army

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  5. Notmyrealname

    Notmyrealname DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer

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    The past is no guide to the future.
     
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  6. Crystalhead

    Crystalhead DI Forum Patron ★★ Forum Sponsor ★★ ★ No Ads ★ Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Veteran Army

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    LMFAO........................ If you want to keep a friend, never borrow and never lend and that is no matter where yah are in the World. Tell them to pawn their sh$t or sell their arse. Once you tell them that , remove yourself clear of the parasite.

    Go to a bank or get a damned rebate from the Pope!
     
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  7. jim787

    jim787 DI Forum Adept

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    Yes, that's another caveat. They may want to sell or pawn something to you. It's always something with no value to an actual pawn shop, such as out-of-date electronics. And with all sincerity, the value they give it is what they paid for it new. I might say, I'm no expert, let's get it appraised at a pawn shop.

    On the other hand, retaining something of real value to the borrower can help to ensure repayment.

    As a rule of thumb, 80% will not return your loan. That's for the Philippines.
     
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  8. Notmyrealname

    Notmyrealname DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer

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    And perhaps 19% will return it over such a prolonged period that it is highly devalued by inflation. I would like to find the 1% left but it's a game of Russian roulette.
     
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  9. Hippiebrian

    Hippiebrian DI New Member

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    • I never lend any money I cannot afford to lose. If it is so much that not paying it back will hurt, it doesn't get loaned. "Sorry, but I can't afford it right now" is the answer they will get. When I loan money, it is a small enough amount (and that will be according to your own situation) that I can just forget about it. No stress, no pain.
     
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  10. OP
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    charlyB

    charlyB DI Forum Adept

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    The main point of my original post that maybe i did not explain too clearly was that in both of the cases in which i lent money i knew the people were perfectly able to pay it back but just chose not to.
    It seems to be in the culture here not to pay back, in my opinion some of the locals look on it as a form of cleverness, its a very short sighted attitude as if you borrow then pay back you can always borrow again in the future but if you don't pay back then in my case the door is closed forever.
     
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