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The Rabbi is leaving

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff' started by KINGCOLE, May 29, 2015.

  1. KINGCOLE

    KINGCOLE DI Senior Member Highly Rated Poster

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    The rabbi announced that he was planning to leave for a larger congregation
    that would pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation. No one
    wants him to leave because he is so popular.

    Fred Shapiro, who owns several car dealerships in town,stands up and
    proclaims, "If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac
    every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"


    The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.

    Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stands and says, "If
    the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and
    establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his
    children!"

    More sighs and loud applause.

    Estelle Rubin, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, "If the rabbi
    stays, I will give him sex!"

    There is total silence.

    The rabbi, blushing, asks her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy
    lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"

    Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, is now trying to hide, holding his
    forehead in his hands and shaking his head from side to side, while his
    wife replies:

    "Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, "f*ck
    him".
     
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