Dumaguete Info Search


watch out

Discussion in 'Expat Section' started by alex, Jan 30, 2016.

  1. nwlivewire

    nwlivewire DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer Blood Donor Veteran Army Navy

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    I can't imagine any man telling me where and when I can go out, either. ....

    If I were married and my husband threatened me I would find a way to leave him high and dry, too.

    "It's More Fun In The Philippines"???

    Hmmmm....as the world turns....

    nwlivewire
     
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  2. DaveD

    DaveD DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer Veteran Navy

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    Actually that is one lesson every foreigner here should learn ASAP that it is the Foreigners who will take you for all they can get including your life savings if you are not careful. The average Filipino is usually only looking to make a couple of extra piso at a silly long nose expense. I can live with that as I usually give a wink and smirk and play the game no problem. But, the foreign con men/women are a different story altogether. They will pretend to be your friend and when your guard is down will try to clean you out. Don't think just because they speak your native language and look like you they can be trusted. Trust must be earned. I have seen many foreigners really hurt by other foreign con men/women here. Be alert and use better judgement please!
     
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  3. Dave_Hounddriver

    Dave_Hounddriver DI Forum Patron Highly Rated Poster

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    That's a game that many don't want to play here. I don't ask others to buy me any beers and I don't want to buy for them. We are all on vastly different incomes here. I might show up expecting to nurse 2 beers for the afternoon as I know my budget and you may want to down a half dozen. That's good when each pays their own way. When someone buys me a beer I say thank you but I purposely do not reciprocate as its a game I do not wish to start. If the fellow never buys me another beer then its a win-win.
     
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  4. nwlivewire

    nwlivewire DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer Blood Donor Veteran Army Navy

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    Dear DaveD:

    Your words ring true to my ears and thank-you for posting.

    V/R,
    nwlivewire
     
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  5. robert k

    robert k DI Forum Patron Highly Rated Poster Veteran Army

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    Out and about you don't need to offer people hospitality. If you invite them to your home, that is different. If it is a beer drinking situation at someone else's house, I will bring some or if it starts after I am there I will get some.

    I once had a guest forced on my by a woman I was seeing. I told her no, my place is a mess and I have nothing to offer for hospitality besides a place to sit. I listened to crap for a few hours then I said ok, but the floor must be cleaned first, you must bring food for the guest he had special requirements, whatever alcoholic beverage he likes, and food for the rest of us. It turned into an invasion with 4 adults and 3 kids. All because my friends sister's foreigner boyfriend had arrived, and he wanted to see my place and talk to another foreigner. I had actually picked him up at the airport when he arrived as a courtesy, I thought I was done.:o o: Long story short, they all showed up, a lot more than I was expecting, they all showed up together, not one coming ahead to sweep the floor as I expected and even though I told them I would reimburse them for the food and drinks for all, they showed up empty handed to my place with the dirty floor. I do dishes, I wash clothes, I don't get the bathroom dirty so it rarely needs cleaning, I don't do floors. All I had to offer the guy was a chair. How is that for famous Texas hospitality? Wrye is correct as he said in another thread, your Face never, ever, enters into the equation.:redface:
     
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  6. KINGCOLE

    KINGCOLE DI Senior Member Highly Rated Poster

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    When we and my wife go to someones house as a guest or for a party, we always take some wine and a dessert, even though we know that it is not expected, as this is the tradition in the UK. I often see people, expats usually, turn up for a party empty handed. I don't judge them, as there may be a valid reason, but have second thoughts when I see how eager they are to eat and drink whatever is provided by the host. So it is not because someone is a filipino or an expat that they act like this, it is their nature, regardless of nationality.
     
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    Last edited: Feb 28, 2016
  7. PatO

    PatO DI Forum Luminary Highly Rated Poster Showcase Reviewer Veteran Marines

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    Reciprocity is not nearly as common here as in my home country.
     
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  8. nwlivewire

    nwlivewire DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer Blood Donor Veteran Army Navy

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    I guess it could be the way a person got raised up at home and the manners they were taught (or not taught as the case may be).

    Even in the old Frontier, pioneer days, when an invitation was accepted between settler families, one came to the dinner or the event with something - no matter how humble one was, or the gift given to the host/hostess. Whether it was a bouquet of flowers plucked fresh from the yard, or churned butter/cheese from the cow, eggs - one just didn't come empty-handed, expecting to be waited on hand and foot.

    To me, it's such a thoughtful little thing to do and a gift to the host/hostess represents a coming together of good tidings. In today's world, most folks don't have to churn butter, pluck flowers and all the rest of it anymore. I'll often ask the Host/Hostess ahead of time if there is anything in particular I can bring that can compliment the meal (beverage?dessert? or?), and whatever he/she suggests is what I bring - plus a small bouquet of flowers.

    I have been invited to BBQs where the menfolk have done the cooking and Boy-oh-Boy, is that ever good eating!

    So I guess it depends on if you got raised up with this set of manners or not - and if you remember or care to use 'em.

    nwlivewire
     
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  9. Rye83

    Rye83 with pastrami Secured Account Highly Rated Poster SC Connoisseur Veteran Army

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    My gf's brother has been going on and on about a new cousin they have come into contact with in Dumaguete. It seems this cousin is married to an American who served in the military (long ago judging from the pictures I have been shown) and for some reason I should be mystified and/or extremely interested in this young lady and her husband. I guess....not sure why he keeps talking about this couple and showing me pictures of people I have never met before in my life. I've been trying to blow it off and not show the slightest bit of interest in the cousin or the expat.

    However, today I was informed that I am invited to dinner this afternoon by this couple through my gf's brother (and confirmed by my gf). I have absolutely no interest in going to someone's house, expat or not, who did not personally invite me. At first I asked my gf "what do they want from me? And why are they so interested in spending time with you, your brother and me?" as I find the entire situation very "convenient" (why did this "cousin" all of a sudden show up out of nowhere, that nobody knew was related to the gf's family in the first place, and take such an interest to the gf's brother, my gf.....and now has an interest in meeting me? :cautious:). I've been trying to come up with a reason other than "I don't want to" all day. Your post just gave me that reason. It might not be that they have bad motives...but the guy just doesn't really know about it or really want me to come either since the invitation was not extended directly to me by the people supposedly hosting dinner. And personally I feel much more comfortable meeting people for the first time on neutral ground somewhere public mainly because I feel awkward in these types of situations and alcohol helps me deal with that discomfort.
     
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  10. DaveD

    DaveD DI Senior Member Showcase Reviewer Veteran Navy

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    Being suspicious by nature (especially since I moved to the PI) I suspect somewhere down the line money/favor etc will be mentioned... Expected from you of course!
     
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