⌛ Lear from each other

to kuting

Kuting, I actually thought your question was very interesting that's why I had to respond, even though you specifically said that you'd rather hear from the Mr

You're right on the dot, though. Being submissive is indeed not the solution to having a harmonious marriage. I believe that marriage is a partnership, without a master nor a slave. It is also composed of compromises, especially when you're both from different cultures. To site an example, some Sundays we go to church (even though he's not Catholic) and some Sundays, we watch Football (I didn't know anything about it before). Some days we have mashed potato and gravy and some days we have rice and adobo.

Both cultures must co-exist in the marriage. It's just a matter of finding the right balance that will work for you

 

Pickled-newt, I'm not sure if you were still in the PI when they had a documentary in Maganding Gabi Bayan about maltreated Filipinas in foreign countries. They married the person without really knowing what they were getting into. I know that it goes both ways too. I've known people here who've been duped by Filipinas and it is a sad sad story. If only people marry for love and not for convenience then divorce rate won't be very high.

 

Kuting, you have made me curious about “ The Joy Luck Club”. If it's not too much to ask, can you give a brief synopsis of the movie? Thanks

 

"Kanos" aren't the only one

If you spend some time in any large cities in US you'll realize that people from many different other cultures are just as "unwilling to adjust/expose themselves to host country's culture" & live within their own neighborhoods...ie. Koreans, mexicans, Chinese, Japanese, middle easterns, africans, indians, vietnamese, Russians...

People on this board should know that Americans aren't the only one's guilty of this.

 

Yes, people are people wherever you go. We all have the same fears, hopes, needs and wants.
To me, there's a difference between emigrating so your children can have a better life and emigrating for retirement.

 

Learn from each other

To : Timn8ter and atlargex; You are all correct in your respective point of views.
Lets not forget that, United States of America is the milting pot, while the PI is the conquered nation. For centuries, we “the Filipinos “were told that Western folks have the superior blood. (Western folks meaning not only Americans)
No argument in that because that is the history book, not good and not bad either.

Having said that, I am going back to my topic which is “Learn from each other”.
“People and people “ ( quote from Timn8ter ) therefore a mix couple should listen and be very clear to each other and come to an agreement on how to manage the family.
Even your pet dog can feel the misunderstanding inside the household.
You might wind up on Network TV doing the “ Super Nanny Show”

Please understand that in reality, their is a language barrier in between an American and a Filipina,

Just like a Techie Engineer from India seating on a staff meeting of mostly American folks. But that’s Corporate America

 

Each much be willing to set aside preconceptions and do their best to understand the other. Yes, there certainly is a language barrier. In my experience, the Filipino has been taught English as a requirement in school where the American may or may not have learned a foreign language (it's not required to) and it's unlikely they studied Filipino culture. It's likely that applies to other westerners as well. The challenge (in my opinion) is greater for the westerner than for the Filipino to understand the history and culture of the other. It also depends on the education level of the Filipino. I've met some who's family was unable to support them through a full education. They've inherited many of the superstitions and misconceptions of their parents, grandparents, etc. It can be hard to get through that sometimes.

 

Thanks crissar , i agree with that
But I wonder why Kuting's not keen to engage with odd replies from the Mrs ...and wot if the mrs is blond? i mean those real blonds and not artificially made blond by hair dressing saloons.:D lol