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Letting go?

Discussion in '☋ General Chat ☋' started by weena, Aug 26, 2009.

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  1. weena

    weena DI Member

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    Why is it too difficult to love someone?I don't understand it!!!It gives me
    headaches and it's very painful to the chest.It can even make me go crazy!!!!

    Do we really have to let go if you really love someone???? Just as the saying goes-"If you love someone...Set him free".

    Loving someone so much is not a crime,right?There are just people in this world who would do and give everything to that someone because of LOVE...But is this the right thing to do?

    For some people,they say it shouldn't be hat way.Leave some for yourself.Giving and showing how much you love that person is enough...not everything and ther is nothing left for yourself.

    I always get so confused and been doing the same mistake over and over... and i don't deny it...but it's true!!!

    In my own point of view i'm not doing anything wrong..but for some other people it's not right.They said it is very "unhealthy" for the other person..He couldn't breath, they said..( i hope i said it right)..

    Anyway,my question is this-"Do we really have to let go of that someone because you love him that much?":confused:
     
  2. jellyfish

    jellyfish DI Forum Patron

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    Weena, I can imagine your doubts.
    My opinion: I should do all which is in my power/possibility to get her (him in your case) changing minds because of the true and burning love you have.
    But there is an end to each struggle:
    Either I did succeed and could make her happy, or .........I have to 'let her go', admitting that I'm not the one (her respected choice) who she is looking for to make her happy.
    Even how hard that will be for me ....if I love her.....I have to accept that and let her go.
    But surely ....damned difficult :D
    I know how that feels btw
     
  3. AntiX

    AntiX DI Member

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    Two thoughts come to mind.
    1. A successful relationship shouldn't be a huge melodramatic struggle. If I was in a relationship resembling a TV show I'd run the opposite direction, fast. A good relationship should be a natural fit for both parties. It shouldn't be any more difficult than eating chocolate cake.
    2. If you (for some reason) give the other everything you have and they take it, they're the wrong person.
     
  4. texasb

    texasb DI Junior Member

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    Weena, you'll get over it. Give it some time. Get busy and focus your thoughts on your career or your family. Pray also for guidance.
     
  5. OP
    OP
    weena

    weena DI Member

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    yeah!!!it's very hard to let go of someone you love so much!!! but i'm trying to do so... you know!!!:(
     
  6. KAYLEIGH

    KAYLEIGH DI Member

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    Hi Weena. I hope you are feeling ok today.
    If you love the person and he doesn't love you back, so why keeping him?
    Let him go, maybe he is not the right one for you. You will find your true love eventually. This is life, it's like gambling, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. There's alot of things that you can do to keep your self busy.
    This is not the end of your love and life, there will be a special someone out there for you in the right place at the right time. You did all your best, giving him everything, but he doesn't deserved your love.
    Enjoy your life & I wish you Good Luck.
     
  7. Don

    Don DI Member

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    Letting Go

    Weena,
    You said: < " They said it is very "unhealthy" for the other person..He couldn't breath, they said.." >

    I'm going to take a chance here, as I do not know you or the other person you are 'letting go'; I do not know anything about either of you; length of time in your relationship; age difference (if any); even nationality / cultural difference.
    However, I would offer this to you. usualy, where I am from in the U.S.of A., the english phrase "...he couldn't breathe"...implies the meaning that one person is/was "smothering" the other - such as hanging on to them 24X7, always, always being with that person, or at least, always checking up on the person, like asking...where were you at 2pm today?..you are 5 minutes late; why?, where were you?..... :mad: which tends to show signs of either mistrust of that person and his/her actions, all the time; or an extremely intense jealousey on the part of that person. :eek:

    Either way....those are very bad/dangerous character traits for ANY relationship to be long term and sustainable.

    Just a thought. I'm not implying that you have these traits...as I said...I do not know anything about your situation. I am only commening upon the phraseology that you, yourself said had been told to you. God Bless, Weena.
     
  8. Panday Pera

    Panday Pera DI Forum Adept

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    There is no better gift in the world than love. True love in never wanting, it is given without any expectations. You cannot lose or let go something you never had so stop worrying about it. Never mistake “Love” for “Possessing”, be happy in the passion you feel. If loving someone makes you feel happy, then that is reward enough.

    There is a saying that goes, “When there is Love there is no pain, when there is Pain that pain is love itself”. But I don’t believe in that. I believe that when there is love there is no pain, when there is pain, that pain is nothing but self pity.

    If you have a change, get the book of Jordan and Margaret Paul entitled, “Do I have to Give Up Me to be Loved by You?”. Never too late to learn about relationships.

    Good Luck my friend, “Love for today, tomorrow is not guaranteed.”

    Just my thoughts….
     
  9. john boy

    john boy DI Forum Luminary

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    "Plenty more fish in the Sea"
     
  10. dumaguetenia

    dumaguetenia DI Forum Adept

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    life is beautiful !

    Hi Weena,
    I think this is the sequence of that Mr. Right ? so you found Mr. Right but that person was not Nice ?
    Weena the choice is yours. Only you can make the conscious decision if you want this person the satisfaction to see you gone crazy. Consider this , how about if this person realized that he loves you and then you gone crazy would you want that ?
    Let him go if that what should be done and while you still love him don't wait until hate and anger will force you to made such decision.
    I am no expert to this kind of problem, but i watch Dr. Phil when i have time. I learned. No matter how hard it may be life will go on. Channel your love and focus to your job and other stuff. And hehehehe.. don't watch that filipino love story movies watch horror or zoombie movies that you can scream from the top of your lungs, and after that you will feel better.:p

    Good luck !
     
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