⌛ Philippine law, you, and marriage

@ PrensBana & jimf,
I hear what you saying about a pre-nup shows the man not being 100% confident in the marriage/relationship, but don't you think pre-nups came into being because the divorce rate in the western world is @ 50%!
It would be great if you found your one true love, and you and she were perfect for each other, and perfectly content with each other, for ever and ever. But the harsh realities of life are that at least as many marriages fail as succeed.
Rushing in to a relationship or not rushing in; I know of rushed marriages that lasted, and also people who were together for years before tying the knot, and then months later divorced!

I think IF pre-nups are/were legal in the Philippines, then the huge disparity in wealth between husband and spouse should be a massive factor in the decision making process.
Finding a wife over the internet, who is much younger, and who wants to get married straight away, is a situation that definitely requires careful consideration regarding financial arrangements. Especially if a house is involved where the expat cannot own the land and many guys have the house in the wife's name.
To all you guys who are living the dream with a devoted and loving wife, respect; but please don't say that a worldly wise man should have more respect for the marriage and shouldn't consider pre-nups. That is simply not realistic! IMHO.

 

Hello Uncle,
You know, I had a similar thought in the back of my mind while I was making my post, and after reading yours, I will admit, it is unrealistic for many.
What I could not consider though, is contemplating marrying a Filipina, or anyone for that matter, with a preconceived notion of failure. To me, that's what a prenup represents, doesn't it to you?
I guess I still have an old fashioned notion of, "the way things ought to be." It's either "all in", or nothing!
I absolutely agree, that a marriage has to be very carefully contemplated. I think if a guy is observant, and takes his time, he will know deep down whether it is the right thing to do.
What I am not sure of, come to think of it, if Philippine laws are similar to Western, in that, if I marry a woman, all of my assetts before the mariage are mine should we get a divorce. Only assetts gained during the marriage are divided.

 

I hear what you are saying that you shouldn't go into a marriage thinking it will fail, but, with such a high failure rate, you have to admit that any clear thinking person should not disregard that possibly eventuality.
100 years ago, couples felt a responsibility to stay together, even if they were unhappy, because of pride, or most often because of family pressures and the shame a divorce would bring.
Divorce however, became more common and more widely accepted, especially in the west, (I blame Liz Taylor ) until we have the situation today where I think people now believe that Mr or Mrs Right might not be found at the first attempt, so just keep trying!
Regarding rights to assets from before, during and after marriage, I would not have a clue (I think Shadow probably has a good idea as to the local situation), but for many retired expats, the only assets normaly gained after retirement are the houses they buy here (paid for from their assets before the marriage I would like to add:D).
The land cannot be theirs, and I think in many, if not most cases, the house is put into the wife's name. So my question here would be, if divorce is illegal in the Philippines, and the house is in a local's(wife's) name, does the husband get anything of the house after 'separation'?
I hadn't actually considered that situation before today, and I would be interested to know what the realities in PI are.

 

Marriage!

I met Azon many years ago, we have this Understanding, what is Yours, is Mine, What is mine is Mine, Seems pretty norm, to accept that Our spouses will always Win, What ever!


Jack P.

 

Divorce however, became more common and more widely accepted, especially in the west, (I blame Liz Taylor ) until we have the situation today where I think people now believe that Mr or Mrs Right might not be found at the first attempt, so just keep trying!
Regarding rights to assets from before, during and after marriage, I would not have a clue (I think Shadow probably has a good idea as to the local situation), but for many retired expats, the only assets normaly gained after retirement are the houses they buy here (paid for from their assets before the marriage I would like to add:D).
The land cannot be theirs, and I think in many, if not most cases, the house is put into the wife's name. So my question here would be, if divorce is illegal in the Philippines, and the house is in a local's(wife's) name, does the husband get anything of the house after 'separation'?
I hadn't actually considered that situation before today, and I would be interested to know what the realities in PI are.[/QUOTE]

Hey Unc, Liz Taylor...or her employer (Hollywood!)?
You know, the latest I heard is that we now have 3 ,4, or even 5 soulmates! Hahahaha
Seriously, you bring a good point. A guy cannot buy property there unless he's married (generally speaking) and the money will come from what he has worked for all is life. Hmmm, I am getting the feeling the old saying, "she got the gold mine I got the shaft" applies in the RP as well!

 

Hi Jack,
Yeah, you know that sounds familiar. I am sure you refer to your wife owning it all?
I remember my ex had the same mind, "what's yours is mine, and what's mine is mine!"
Well, she is my ex!

 

The reality is very simple, you are the "alien" (they don't call you foreigner) and will get nothing.

 

That sums it up

 

Got a Good One!

Spot on Jim!

You know that most of use here, have a good Wife/Partner, Most of the things we read about, do not happen to us, it is usually a Friend or Friend of a Friend, that has the problem. One thing for sure, although I will never own anything here, we always consider it OURS!
I have always thought, We, Us & Ours are small words, that are the basis of a good marriage.
For me, 2nd time around is working, we pull together, Share the good and bad times, even letting our monster have an Input. After all, it will all be Hers in the End. :D


Jack P.

 

You may even get away, with you life......