A newly married couple sit down for their first dinner made by the wife. As the husband begins eating she says, “I want you to know that meatloaf and apple pie are my two specialties”. The husband nods and says, “so which one is this”. A guy goes into a drugstore and asks the blonde at the counter: “I would like twelve condoms please Miss”. The blonde gets red in the face and replies: “Don’t miss me!” “OK, make it thirteen then.”