Best Posts in Thread: Where's the humor on here?

To go with a recent Topic.

 

Now this I like.

I guess it could relate to anywhere.

 

ins ·


An illegal immigrant picks up a hooker. "Hey, how much you charge for da hour, sister?" he asks. "$100" she replies. In broken English, he says, "Do you do immigrant style?" "No" she says. "I pay you $200 to do immigrant style." "No," she says, not knowing what immigrant style is. "I pay you $300." "No," she says. "I pay you $400." "No," she says. So finally he says, "OK, I pay $1,000 to do immigrant style". She thinks, "Well, I've been in the game for over 10 years now. I've had every kind of request from weirdoes from every part of the world. How bad could immigrant style be?" So she agrees and has sex with him. Finally, after several hours, they finish. Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says, "Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting. But that was ok. So, what exactly is immigrant style?" The illegal immigrant replies you send the bill to the government

 

Probably posted before but I am not going to look through 304 pages of jokes... now for the second joke:

One young Filipina had her choice of three expats men to marry she was telling her friend. Each seemed to have the same financial ability to support her. One was in his early 40, physically fit, and always moving about with lots of adventures. The second had recently moved here to enjoy the retired life. He was active but not adventurous, and only in his early 60s. The third was 92, and in frail health. He seldom got out of bed, and she would have to go out by herself if she wanted adventure in her life. Her friends asked who she was going to marry, and she calmly replied, “the oldest one, he will not live as long”. Just a little perspective into a Filipina’s decision making process.... hahahaha ( Ever hear “FOGED” “Fat old guy easy die” as a description for an Expat?) .

 

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   Dale King
   21 October · Enid, OK, United States ·
   
   
   Got my gun permit yesterday, then went over to the local gun shop to get a small 9mm for home protection.
   
   When I was ready to pay by credit card for the gun and bullets, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."
   
   Making a mental note to complain to the NRA about the gun control wackos running amok, I did as she had instructed.
   
   When the hysterical shrieking and alarms subsided, I found out she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader.
   
   I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.
   
   They need to make their instructions to seniors a little clearer.