Discussion in 'Funny Stuff' started by grandpainak, Apr 16, 2007.
The man looks also like thinking: "Your mouth is smelling very terrible!"
For some reason (that I won't disclose here ) I ran across uranium being sold on Amazon. The questions and answers section is...absolutely glorious:
I Googled "how to start a fire".
I got 48,500 matches.
I think the uranium is made in China and misspelled, it should be spelled urine.
The habal habal guys here can't hold a candle to this guy. Just wear your brake pad shoes.
Three bulls heard the rancher was bringing another bull onto the ranch.
First Bull: “I’ve been here five years. I’m not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows.”
Second Bull: “I’ve been here three years and have earned my right to 50 cows. I’m keeping all my cows.”
Third Bull: “I’ve only been here a year, and so far, you guys have only let me have 10 cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I’m keeping all 10 of my cows.”
Just then an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they’ve ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp.
First Bull: “I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend.”
Second Bull: “I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I’m certainly not looking for an argument.”
They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting.
First Bull: “Son, don’t be foolish — let him have some of your cows and live to tell about it.”
Third Bull: “Hell, he can have all my cows. I’m just making sure he knows I’m a bull.”
I was reading my hometown paper about an impending HEAT WAVE, kinda made me chuckle.
(THUNDER BAY, ON) – Be advised, citizens, we have a heat wave coming down upon us. Keep cool and drink lots of water. Bring the kids to the splash pad and other cooling activities.
Below is the alert issued by Environment Canada regarding the heat!
Special weather statement in effect for:
City of Thunder Bay
Cloud Bay – Dorion
Kakabeka Falls – Whitefish Lake – Arrow Lake
The first heat event of the season is expected today.
A hot air mass is expected to pay a brief visit to the Thunder Bay area today, with afternoon temperatures near 30 degrees expected. Humidex values may reach the mid thirties.
Cooler air from Lake Superior is expected to return by this evening, with temperatures remaining somewhat lower Friday into the weekend.
These conditions pose a health risk when you are not used to the heat.
Everyone is at risk from heat, especially older adults; infants and young children; and people with chronic illnesses.
You are advised to 1) drink plenty of cool liquids before feeling thirsty; and 2) keep cool by dressing for the weather and spending a few hours each day in a cool place.
This works great on the Blvd, anywhere in downtown Dumaguete, or Hypermart, as well as the mall.
I think I will go to the mall,
find a great parking spot,
and sit in my car with the
reverse lights on.