Discussion in 'Funny Stuff' started by grandpainak, Apr 16, 2007.
A man is having a job interview, this was a place in a sweet factory making sticks of Rock Candy the type you get at seaside resorts with the writing all through it.
So the would be employer asks him how much Rock can you produce in a day, he said 15miles per day, the Boss said that is impossible the best any of my employees can do is; 10mls on a good day and that is plain rock without writing in it, can you do the writing as well and still produce this 15mls, Yes Sir he replied.
So the Boss decides to phone his former employer in the Blackpool Rock Company and this conversation takes place, Sir there is a man in my office applying for a job with me as a Rock Maker and claims he can make 15mls per day with up to 25 letters included in it, can this be true? Reply; If the mans name is John Smith he is telling the truth, unfortunately I had to pay him off last week, this pandemic is killing tourism in our area and our sales are down at an all time low, but a word of warning about John, if the time comes when you have to pay him off, terminate him on the spot and see him out the door; Why is that the other man said; Reply; I let him work till the end of the day and now have 15 miles of Rock wasting in my stockroom, written all through this Rock is;
STICK YER FCUKING JOB UP YER ARSE.
A Blind man along with his Guide Dog is standing at a pedestrian crossing waiting on the light to change, his Dog decides to Pee all down his leg, at that the man takes a dog treat out of his pocket to give to his dog, another man standing nearby says to the Blind man, your Dog has just peed all down your leg and yet you decide to give it a dog treat?
The Blind man replies; DON'T BE FCUKING STUPID I HAVE TO FIND WHICH END HIS HEAD IS AT SO I CAN FOOT HIM RIGHT UP THE ARSE