Since when is it a crime to ask someone if they're a member of Dumaguete Info? Probably most members here are only able to get to Duma once a year at best, and it would be wonderful to be able to meet the people who make this forum so interesting and colorful. I think it's great that people who love this tiny city are reaching out to each other from all corners of the world just to hear about what's going on there. I'm definitely hoping to meet some members when I come down there on the 18th.

 

I think what happened here is a classic case of cultural differences. What could be a friendly querry to one, could be an intrusion of privacy to the other. I have noticed, (actually my husband pointed it out to me) that most of us Filipinos tend to ask personal questions to a new acquaintance "to break the ice" .

I (and most of us) would be able to know a person's personal background in less than 5 minutes (name, work, married, kids, in-laws etc). On the other hand, my husband would be talking with somebody for an hour, and all he got is a s name and maybe the business she/he is in. When I asked my husband PERTINENT questions about the person he would tell me "I don't ask PERSONAL questions.

I would probably do the same if I was in the same situation as Chissar. Not to be Nosy (well, maybe a little), but because I will be so excited to finally meet somebody at this forum. However, friendliness can sometimes be misconstrude as invasion of privicy. In fairness to Viper ACR, it was his personal choice, and I respected that. Reading his initial message though, it appears (as if) he is trying to make amends to Chissar.

Can we just get along!

 

Hi Cactusflower.

You really think that 1st message from that fella was an attempt at making ammends to Chrissar? I suppose if I reached really hard in my fantasy world, maybe. I guess a few of us know the history of this acr person and how distructive he tries to be for this site. He attempts to be subtle at first in his remarks to get you sucked in and then verbally slaps you, if your a female anyway. He is odd in that way, he seems to be abusive to women in general. If Chrissars' husband had approached that day instead of Chrissar, the outcome would have been much different because women haters are generally scared of men in person. Anyway, he is getting what he wants in his odd way. If you look at his past posts, you'll quickly catch on to his oddities and that way, you'll also understand. Chrissar on the other hand has a good history on the forum and as you can probably tell, has a good heart. There is a wide gulf between both persons' That's just my two cents worth. I just didn't want you to get the wrong impression of a good person on the forum.

 

I went back and re-read this threat from the very beginning.....IMO the first trace of venom I detected didn't come from the Viper.

 

Okay, my bad then. Chrissar, how dare you cause trouble, how dare you approach a man in kindness at a cafe about a mutual interest such as this forum and attempt to strike up a brief conversation, and above all, how dare you get upset with finding out that same man lied to you about being a member of this forum. I think your trouble young lady and I hope you've learned from this experience not to be kind in the future! And of course that last line in that fellas first post on this string about the dumaguete forum is precise, how do we do it? Again, my bad. I won't let it happen again.........

 

Cactusflower, I do owe you an apology about the fantasy world remark. That seriously was inappropriate, and I'm sorry, We just read the same post in a different way, and that's common on the internet for that to happen. I was just looking at the situation from Chrissars' point of view and really reading vipers' first post as a slam against her, and was surprised people would view it any differently, but I guess that can happen. I obviously still see it that way partially because of the history that Chrissar has on this forum and secondly because there is no other purpose, but, for him being nasty. Chrissar has always been kind with people. By the way, how I apologized to you to make ammends, is how it is normally done. I may have missed that in the first post from viper to Chrissar, and that is why I figured he was simply being more abusive to her, by posting that, to renew his attempt at hurting her??? I'm just glad it is no longer going to be successful though.

 

I'm not going to comment specifically on statements made in this thread.
Lord knows I've posted my share of stupid comments on Internet forums with regret. Even though I'm relatively anonymous I have no desire to make enemies, in real life or cyberspace.
I've since learned to review a member's posts before passing judgement based on a single comment.

 

TimN8ter sitting on the fen8ter:D

 

Hey, I was trying to be as ambiguous as possible. :p